In his book Atomic Habits, author James Clear uses the phrase “Valley of Disappointment” to describe an early phase of trying to change a habit. People set goals and implement small changes, but after weeks or months see little progress. They get discouraged during this time and quit trying. This period of frustration and apparent lack of progress is the “Valley of Disappointment.”
Often Christians experience a similar phenomenon. Maybe they’ve lost a family member to death. Maybe they’ve suffered a faith crisis. Maybe it’s persecution or a life-altering illness. Maybe it’s disappointment in others or struggle with persistent sin. Regardless of the specific problem, Christians find themselves at a turning point with no choice but to start over again. They make the necessary changes and press on. Only to find themselves in a rut, with no resolution in sight.
It’s less about disappointment than despair – a feeling of loss or hopelessness, worrying that either God won’t answer or that he’s already answered with a resounding “No!” Less a Valley of Disappointment than a Valley of Despair. That’s not to minimize the importance of good habits, nor is it to suggest that the frustrations of habit building don’t sometimes lead to despair. It does, however, remind us that in Christ we’re dealing with matters that touch the essence of who we are as people made in God’s image, and with matters that have eternal implications.
Persistence is the key to nurturing good habits and working through the Valley of Disappointment. Likewise, perseverance (the spiritual version of persistence) sees us through the Valley of Despair. Part of perseverance is simply waiting. “My soul, wait in silence for God only, for my hope is from Him” (Psalm 62.5). The greater the despair, the greater the need for patience. “I am weary with my crying, my throat is parched, my eyes fail while I wait for my God” (Psalm 69.3).
This kind of waiting, however, is anything but passive. “Wait for the Lord and keep his way” (Psalm 37.34a). It’s not mere resignation, but full of hope. “And now, Lord, for what do I wait? My hope is in you” (Psalm 39.7). Such patient perseverance is rewarded by God. “The Lord favors those who fear Him, those who wait for his lovingkindness” (Psalm 147.11).
The Valley of Despair is as dark a place as imaginable. It’s full of frustration and uncertainty. It’s a place where Satan exploits our doubts and fears and convinces us that continuing the course is futile.
Faith knows better, for in faith, we “rejoice in hope, persevere in tribulation, and devote ourselves to prayer” (Romans 12.12).